Saturday was one of the lowest days I have had since our journey began. I was really letting too many "what if's" cloud my thinking and really ended up in a funk. MTM admitted that he was feeling the same way. The wait feels so unnecessary sometimes for our sake and our daughter's. We feel so ready that we ache for her. I can only imagine her aching for a family to love and care for her. It is easy to get lost in those thoughts. That is when I try to remind myself that it is impossible for us to see the big picture and there must be good reason for this time until she comes home. I also remind myself that I believe with my whole heart that we are meant to adopt a child into our home so we must accept that waiting is part of the process.
It became easier to put these reminders into action when I heard myself telling my son the very same thing about getting used to his new school. I told him that first he needed to accept that this is what he is required to do everyday. It is part of growing up to deal with change. Take it one day at a time.
I could apply all of that to myself in dealing with my funk. It's funny how these life lessons can come in all sorts of packages.
So, I am done with my funk and I am moving ahead with preparations for our daughter. I hope it isn't too long or she is going to end up with one gaudy, overly pink and polka dotted bedroom.
Until next time,
DMM
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