Waiting!

     Clearly I am supposed to learn patience in my lifetime because over the last 3 and a half years I have certainly been put to the test.  I do feel that I am getting better at waiting but some days are still better than others.  Since we decided that we would open our door to fostering again we received several calls right away. Some referrals we couldn't accept and 2 that we accepted but didn't happen.  The first one we accepted was an infant girl.  They told us they would get back to us after they had worked out placing all of her siblings.  No one ever called.  Finally, I called and asked what happened.  The agency said they were still working things out.  Never heard what happened.  The second referral that we accepted was another infant girl.  I was really getting excited about this one!  I went into my nesting mode which included cleaning my house top to bottom and pulling out clothing that might fit her.  I waited, and waited, and waited.  No word until about 36 hours later that she would not be coming.  That was almost 3 weeks ago.  Not one call!  Weird huh!  I won't begin to try to figure it out because there is one thing you can count on with Foster Care...unpredictability.
     In the mean time I am practicing living day to day and moment to moment!

Have a great day!
DMM

Turning the negative to a positive!

  Our time with her was nothing short of a blessing.  Did we have to go through pain and hurt in this process?  Yes.  Did we learn from the pain and hurt?  Yes!  I have no doubt about that.  I learned that our family was given the task of planting the seed of love and joy in this little girl's life.  I will proudly say that I think we did a stellar job!  Please don't feel that it was all for naught because she left us.  The seed we planted will grow because love never dies.  Even though we can't see with our own eyes now what is happening in her life, I do know one thing for sure....love will grow in her precious little heart.

Love and Joy to you all,
DMM

(continuation)
     We had a nice respite from worry about her leaving us and difficulties with visits etc. for about three months.  In that time, we got into such a groove of life with the new member of our family that we almost forgot she wasn't ours.  Fostering became so natural and had fallen into place so beautifully until.... the other shoe dropped.  After seven months with her we find out that the potential for placement with her grandmother was becoming very possible.  Over the next three months we lived a roller coaster of emotions wondering if she would soon be leaving us.  I wouldn't let myself believe it because I didn't think I could keep living daily life with thoughts of her leaving.  The final word came in May and with no transition plan in place she left our home one morning to live in a home she had never seen and with a grandma she barely knew.  Our hearts were broken.  Our family mourned her loss together and separately in our own way.  The only relief we had was the fact that her mother decided to keep in contact with us through texting and pictures.  At least we had some way of knowing how she was doing.

(to be continued)